Friday, July 2, 2010

The Damaged Door

We've had a bit of a set back. Honestly, I wonder that it isn't because he's just bored.

Yesterday, Tristan had one of the worst tantrums he's had in a while. It's doesn't even get close to the ones he had about a year ago, but he still managed to tear up his bedroom door. At the time, I thought he was throwing toys at the door, but he told me today that he was punching it.

He kicked his sister and I told him to sit in time out. He refused, so I gave him a choice. He could go to time out or go to his room. He refused both. I had to call our neighbor over to watch the girls while I handled Tristan. He kicked and fought all the way up the stairs.

I finally managed to get him to his room. He usually rages for a little while, then calms himself down. When he's done raging, he knocks on the door to let me know he's ready to come out. He didn't knock and I went to check on him. That's when I discovered the door.

I was aghast at what I found. I simply couldn't believe he'd torn up another door. The door will cost $150 to replace. We're moving away in a few months and the housing office isn't going to want to fix that, they'll just replace it.

I know it doesn't look like much here, but remember, my seven year old made those with his fists.

When I found it, he hid from me in his closet. I didn't yell at him or spank him or anything.  I was just so stunned. I quietly told him how upset I was and that he would not be coming down from his room for the rest of the day (it was about 4:00 at the time.) He ate his dinner in his room, then put himself to bed.

This morning, C went into Tristan's room and removed all of his toys. He's grounded from video games for two weeks. We have a chart with money values on it and he will do chores to work off the $150 for the door.

Honestly, I'm not really sure what else to do. I can't decide if it's too harsh or not harsh enough. The last time he tore up the door, he was six and was very ill. We didn't make a big deal out of it because he ended up going into the hospital. This time, he's old enough to understand and face the consequences of his actions.